apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
