my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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