Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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