Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Randomize
