PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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