In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
