There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
