and next time when you feel me up, do it right
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
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