he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
