Please don't use social media to get back at me.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
