Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Randomize
