Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
