i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Randomize
