so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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