I was born with a shot glass in my hand
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
