I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
