were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize