She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
