I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
