I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
