jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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