I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize