ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
