So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
