i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
