and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
We just shotgunned beers for America
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize