man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize