is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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