I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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