Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
