Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
