Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
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