what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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