During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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