Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
