I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
