We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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