i barfeds in our rink
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
