I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
