I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
