gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
