Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
