She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Oh god it's open bar.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
