Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Alive.
So much puke
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
