I'd wear matching sweaters with you
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
