you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
