I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
