FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
