Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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