Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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